Titles and such, SMH

In a Relationship? Dating Exclusively?? Single??? It’s Complicated????

Let me begin with a disclaimer: I am not in any of the above situations, so therefore I am probably NOT qualified to define the above categories. But I’ve had enough of the dating “titles”! Either you’re in or you’re not. There is no such thing as kinda in a relationship. So the following are my definitions to the terms with examples and anecdotes =)

Single!!


This one is simple and clear cut-me, myself and I or you, yourself and…err, yourself. You can however be dating-not to be confused with dating exclusively-and single. If you are single you are not committed to anyone but yourself. Single folks can enjoy the company of the opposite sex-or same sex if that’s what your into-and not have to concern themselves with all the superfluous nonsense. “Whereyouatewhereyou goingwhereyoubeenwhoyouwithwhatyoudoingwhyyoudoingthat?” They just simply don’t have to care. And furthermore would prefer not to be hassled with those questions either. Because once you start asking/answering those questions you have moved on from single territory and into the danger zone.


Dating Exclusively??




I have to laugh when I think about this one because what exactly is the difference between dating and dating exclusively?? The way I see it, when you are dating, you date a whole bunch of different folks. They know you date many people and they themselves also date others. There may or may not be sex involved, depending on who you ask. Dating exclusively provides all the comforts of being in a relationship, with the ease of being able to walk away if it gets scary. I think dating exclusively implies less EXPECTATION than being in a relationship.

In a Relationship??

Oh boy, this is a good one. Sometimes, both parties don't agree on their actual status and I find more women saying they are in a relationship and the men saying they are dating? What's that about anyway?? I digress. Just the other day I was tweeting with someone about the importance about titles and I remember saying this- "Without a label you can't truly fulfill your purpose. And that's in anything. Even at your job you have a title...But that's what the label is for: to create a commitment to fulfilling the role of said title!" And there you have it, Folks! Being in a relationship is about knowing your purpose, creating expectations, and having a commitment to fulfilling the role of being a girl/boy friend. The lines often get blurred when you start doing relationship-esque things (i.e. sex, paying bills, living together etc) when you are single or dating. You have then created an environment where there are no expectations or commitment. If you can get all of these things outside of being in a relationship, what is the point of being in one?? I'm just saying...